This type of artificial "contact" contradicts the process of meaningful interpersonal interactions (to be explained), which generates love and attraction.
To explain the problem, I need to first elucidate the ingredients for love and the meaningful interactions.
Good suggestions, but please note that the impression and feelings you have about the candidates on the basis of online screening are different from the impression and feelings developed from direct face-to-face interactions.
Please see the example I used in reply to the third commenter. How does meeting someone online actually effect later relationships?
(Although online daters may be able to exchange messages after they pass each other's initial screening on the basis of evaluating the category-based information, the process is the opposite of the interaction-based attraction).
The meaningful interactions depend on two factors: (1) the right opportunities (the right time, place, persons, and further communications) and, (2) the right mind (absence of biases about the self and others). Although psychological research on attraction has identified several variables, such as disclosure reciprocity (revealing intimate aspects of oneself to others), mutual eye gazing, mutual reward, similarity and physical attractiveness, these variables are worthless unless people who possess the attributes and tendencies have the opportunities to implement them to the targets of attraction.
Just so you all are safe from one more psycho, really. Some guy who frequented a dating forum I went on, was arrested a few month ago, for keeping child porn on his computer. It has the word 'Fonteyne' or 'Lex' in some of his usernames, also 'Xenon' and 'Baboon'. Dating sites are merely a way to meet; the rest of it (getting to know one another face-to-face) is just like "normal" dating.
Just so you all are safe from one more psycho, really. My most successful relationships have been through online dating, because I can get to know some important things about a person before meeting him, such as whether or not he wants kids (I don't) and whether or not he smokes (I don't and don't want to be with someone who does.) Also, for the most part, people who are on dating sites are actually available and looking (never mind the liars who are cheating.) In a sense, online dating is actually much more efficient than meeting someone the "normal" way because, say, if you meet a cute guy in the checkout line you have no way of knowing if he's available, looking, or if he even lives in your zip code.
The basic ingredients for love As demonstrated by studies on interpersonal attraction, creating and maintaining love involves validating communications between the partners on a variety of issues, including understanding and concern for the partner's personal and emotional needs, developing companionship, physical attractiveness, cultivating and nurturing physical, emotional, intellectual and spiritual well beings, respecting, supporting, forgiving, accepting and encouraging, expressions of appreciation and affection: sexual pleasure and fidelity, commitment, shared activities, as well as the absence of controlling, defensiveness, contempt, stonewalling, and blaming, among other factors.
To accomplish the above tasks, the partners need to engage in the meaningful interactions (face-to-face interactions, including both verbal and nonverbal communications), which allow one person to give to and receive from the other.
This is because the online dating/matching (as provided by the commercial websites) lacks the basic ingredients for developing real love.
The most evident problem involves its use of several categories (plus a few photos) for the daters to predict and decide the effectiveness and success of their further interactions with one another.
What you're not getting is that while it's not face to face at the start, it serves both to delay and to heighten sexual tension. or eharmony have a lower, higher, or ths same chance of divorce inside of three years, seven years, and ten years?