If she's crazy about museums and monuments, you can infer she's a history buff—or better yet, ask her if she's a history buff. You'll get major insight on her goals and priorities in life.
You can gauge whether she's philanthropic, an outdoor buff with a killer bucket list, and everything in between.
"Not only do you get to hear about her life story, but the snippet that's most meaningful and important to her," Jones explains.
She'll get a little reminiscent with this conversation starter. And who knows, maybe you went to the same camp or vacation spot each summer.
"It's fun to see what you might have had in common as kids," Jones says You'll learn about the people closest to her in life.
Good: You can see if she has a tight bond with her parents or siblings. "The five people we're around the most, shape us the most; her relationship to any one of her closest friends and family members tell you a lot about her," Jones says Waiting to be seated at your table or for your waiter to arrive?
Her interests are reflected in what she likes to watch on a daily basis. Is she on the road to self-improvement and solely reads to better herself and her career, or does she read for pleasure? "This is a good way to know what her intellectual interests and passions are," Sullivan says "Instead of asking how close she is with her family, ask: 'Who's the most influential person in your life? "This will tell you more about her family dynamics and close relationships she has with friends." Unless she moved around a lot as a kid (this should spark questions, too), asking whether she still talks to friends from childhood will reveal how she values relationships and loyalty.
Catching her off guard is a good thing so long as your intentions are innocent and playful.
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"It's a sign you'd like to know her beyond surface level, while still giving her the freedom to reveal what she wants to share—and doesn't." This question lets you get a sense of what she feels strongly about and whether she's spirited and heartfelt.
It's also the perfect way to gauge whether her level of passion is compatible with yours, Jones says. Each of these explanations reveals something about her character.
"This is a great query because a dream job merges meaning, passion, and lifestyle," Jones explains. If things get a bit awkward or serious, divert to a more carefree topic.